The usher-greeter group has also contributed to the increased compliance to proper decorum inside the church. Many of the usher-greeters remind erring church-goers right at the church entrance doors. This is before the church-goers even come in.
Strapless and sleeveless gowns do not meet the proper dress attire. Yet, they've become an exception in wedding masses. But they are still improper dresses for wedding mass readers.
Sad to say, proper decorum, as far as electronic gadgets are concerned, is sometimes not observed in wedding masses. It's understandable that
some may need to use cameras to take the occasional photos especially at the processional and pictorials. But how about texting and even answering the cellphone in the middle of the Holy Mass?
Cases of Cellphone Abuse in Weddings
Here are cases of attendees using phones that I've personally observed in wedding masses:
- Texting at the Pews
This happened right after the processional. When the gentlemen have bee-lined towards their places in the pews, everyone just pulled out their phones - like it's the most natural thing to do! It may have been a bandwagon effect, I don't know. But it was one guy after the other, whipping out a phone in order to text.
- On the Phone in the Processional
This is one of the secondary sponsors. The guy just didn't care about walking down the aisle with the cellphone on his ear. He was laughing shouting to whoever was at the other end. He probably felt it was cool for his photo to be taken by the photographer with a cellphone stuck in his ear. This, while walking in the entourage procession. Yeah, right.
- On the Phone during Marriage Rites
This one takes the cake. During the actual marriage rites, all godparents need to stand beside the couple. One elderly gentleman's phone rang. Immediately, he answered the phone while there beside the couple and the priest administering the rites. He didn't even put the call on hold. Assuming it was an emergency, I would've thought he'd go outside the church to excuse himself. No, he simply turned his back from the priest and spoke right there!
Gentlemen Rather Than Ladies
From the stories mentioned above, you could glean that it's the gentlemen who are more guilty of this cellphone addiction.
A lady godparent in one wedding kept tinkering with her cellphone during the Q&A. I'm guessing she was trying to avoid eye contact with the priest or she was looking for answers (to the priest's questions) on her cellphone.
So why is it that it is more gentlemen than the ladies who pull out their phones during the wedding?
Well, ladies, more than the gents, love weddings. It is understandable they'd rather not disturb the solemnity of the wedding rites. Most guys, on the other hand, want the wedding done and over with. Add to that fact is that gowns don't typically have pockets to put cellphones. They'd probably have cellphones in bags or purses though.
Cellphone Usage in Wedding Masses
I attribute this cellphone usage phenomenon in wedding masses to the attendees. Many of them are not parishioners of our church. They just choose our church (which is quite nice, in my opinion) to get married. So they're not even familiar with the "house rules" of our parish. Some of them may not even be Catholics. In many of the weddings, it is just either the bride or the groom who is a parishioner. The other partner typically comes from another parish.
Lessons Learned
It's not a foolproof solution, but those attending the wedding mass need to be reminded about cellphone usage behavior. Here's a "turn off cellphones" reminder that may be announced five minutes before the wedding mass starts:
"Good afternoon everyone. As a reminder from the church, and in consideration for the couple, (state the bride and groom's names), we ask everyone to turn off their cellphones in the duration of the wedding mass. Again, please turn off your cellphones in the duration of the wedding mass. Call time for the wedding mass is at 4 pm. The wedding will begin in 5 minutes. Thank you."
